The Ultimate Collection Of 95 Funny Grandparent Quotes You Can’t Miss

Written by: Lara
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Whether it’s Grandparent’s Day, your grandma’s birthday, Grandpa’s retirement party, or a regular Tuesday where you just want to give them a good heartfelt laugh, these funny grandparents quotes are exactly what you need!

You’ve stumbled upon the mother lode of funny grandparent jokes and quotes that will have you grinning from ear to ear, and maybe even snorting with laughter. We’ve dived into the depths of grandparent wisdom and humor to bring you this hilarious collection of 92 quotes that will make you appreciate your beloved grandparents even more. Because let’s face it, grandparents are the real MVPs of family life. They’re like a fine wine, getting better with age, but with a hint of goofiness thrown in just for fun.

So, let’s check them out!

Save these funny grandparents quotes

Don’t forget to save these funny grandparents jokes on Pinterest for the next celebration!

95 funny grandparents quotes for cards with a note that reads "grandparent's Day"

Funny grandparents jokes for your own parents

1. If nothing is going right, call your grandmother.

2. No one can spoil a child like a grandparent.

3. Grandparents are like the human version of Google – they have an answer for everything, even if it’s not quite right.

4. Grandparents: where discipline, like the remote, is lost, and cookies are found.

5. Thanks for being the grandparents our kids love to visit – probably because you spoil them rotten!

6. You know you’re a grandparent when you secretly hope your grandkids misbehave, just to watch your own kids squirm.

7. Happy Father’s Day to an amazing dad and one kick-ass grandparent.
(Shop card at Etsy)

Funny card for a grand dad with "Happy father's Day to an amazing dad and one kick-ass grandpa"
Photo courtesy of Quirky Card Company

For more funny messages and card ideas for dads, check out this list of the 67 funniest Father’s Day card quotes!

8. Grandparents, the reason our kids think that rules are just suggestions.

9. Our kids know you as ‘Nana’ and ‘Papa,’ but we know you as the ‘Child Spoiling Experts.’

10. You’ve upgraded from ‘Mom and Dad’ to ‘Nana and Papa,’ and you’re nailing this grandparenting thing!

11. You know you’re a grandma when…You used to get angry at me and now laugh when your grandkids do the same thing.

12. Our kids love you more than video games, and that’s saying something!

13. The only thing better than having you as my parents… is my children having you as grandparents!
(Shop card at Etsy)

A card for grandparents with 'the only thing better than having you as my parents"
Photo courtesy of Designing Moments

Funny grandparents jokes for your grandparents

14. Grandparents: the only people who can get you the ‘good’ candy when your parents say no.

15. Grandparents are your first friends and your forever friends.

16. Grandparents’ advice: always valuable, even when it’s about how to clean your room.

17. Grandparents are the ultimate experts at saying ‘yes’ when your parents say ‘no.’

18. The grandparent rule: If mom and dad say ‘no,’ ask grandma and grandpa!

19. Grandma and Grandpa, you make getting older look fun. Maybe it’s because you never act your age!

20. Everyone should have grandparents like you! (I mean, why should I be the only one to suffer).

21. I used to think you had all the answers when I was a kid. Now I know you were just really good at guessing!

22. They say children are the rainbow of life, and grandchildren are the pot of gold, so you’re welcome!

23. Grandma and Grandpa, you’ve been around so long that even Google asks for your advice!

24. I caught the best grandparents.
(Shop card at Etsy)

A funny grandparents quote on a card with "I caught the best grandparents"
Photo courtesy of Manson Road

25. I’m pretty sure you’re responsible for my sweet tooth, Grandma – you always had the best candy stash!

26. Grandparents: where every day feels like a weekend, and every meal feels like a feast.

27. You taught me to always tell the truth, so here it is: your cookies are way better than mom’s!

28. You do not really understand something unless you can explain it to your grandmother.

29. You might be older, but you’re still the coolest grandparents around!

30. If Mom says no, ask Grandma. If Grandma says no…Who are we kidding? Grandma never says no.

31. Sorry you had to raise my dad/mom in order to get me.

32. I hope I inherit your humor, your wisdom, and your amazing cooking skills, Grandma and Grandpa!

33. I know you’ve loved me since I was born, but I’ve loved you my whole life.

34. I love that we don’t have to say out loud that I’m your favorite grandchild.
(Shop card at Etsy)

Funny grandparents joke card with "I love tht we don't have to say out loud that I'm your favorite grandchild"
Photo courtesy of Little May Papery

Sweet and funny grandparents quotes

35. You are the best grandparent of all the grandparents that ever grandparented.

36. You’re like a parent, only grander.

37. The world needs more grandparents because those grandchildren aren’t going to spoil themselves.

38. A grandparent is someone you look up to, no matter how tall you get.

39. If you’re lucky enough to be a grandparent, you’re lucky enough.

40. Only the best parents get promoted to grandparents.

41. Grandparents are the original tech support, always one call away.

42. Grandma’s love is the kind of love that comes with extra whipped cream and sprinkles.

43. You two put the ‘grand’ in grandparenting.

44. Awesome parents make great grandparents.

45. Nacho average grandparents.
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Funny grandparents joke card with "Nacho average grandparents"
Photo courtesy of Manson Road

Funny Grandparents Day quotes

46. Grandkids are your reward for not killing your kids. Happy Grandparent’s Day!

47. Happy Grandparent’s Day! Thanks for being the grand champions of our family.

48. We hope Grandparent’s Day brings you as much joy as you’ve brought to our lives.

49. You’ve taught us that growing old is mandatory, but growing up is entirely optional. Happy Grandparent’s Day

50. Here’s to the best grand team in the universe – Happy Grandparent’s Day!

51. Grandparents: because it takes wisdom, love, and a sense of humor to run this family!

52. I think having me as your grandchild is enough of a gift (you’re welcome). Happy Grandparent’s Day!

53. Happy Grandparent’s Day! Anyone dealing with my dad/mom’s bullsh*t this long deserves a trophy and a special day!
(Shop card at Etsy)

"happy grandparents Day card"
Photo courtesy of Offensive Occasions US

Funny first-time grandparent quotes

54. Congratulations on leveling up to Grandparent status! Your new role comes with special powers, like the ability to spoil and return the kids.

55. You’ve just been promoted to the ‘No Rules’ team. Enjoy your newfound freedom!

56. Grandparents: because you’ve done your time as parents, and now it’s time to have fun.

57. Now that you’re grandparents, you can officially put your parenting skills to the test… on the grandkids.

58. Congrats on your new title of ‘Grand,’ where bedtime is a negotiation, and candy is the currency.

59. Congrats on your new job as babysitter grandparent.
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Funny congratulations card for new grandparents
Photo courtesy of Sweet Whispers Studio

60. Becoming grandparents means you get to enjoy all the perks of parenthood without the sleepless nights. Lucky you!

61. Now that you’re grandparents, it’s time to let loose, spoil the grandkids, and enjoy the show!

62. Welcome to the world of grandparenthood, where diapers are optional, and playtime is non-stop!

63. Congratulations on your new role as grandparents! It’s time to embrace the chaos and enjoy every moment.

64. Grandparenting is everything they say it is (plus you get to send them home when they misbehave). Congratulations!

65. This lucky baby is winning the grandparent lottery.
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Funny grandparents quotes card "lucky baby winning the grandparents lottery"
Photo courtesy of Age Friendly Vibes

For older grandparents

If you love this funny grandparents quote then you will love these funny birthday cards and wishes for your nan and pop too!

66. Grandparents are like a fine wine; they get better with age and make you giggle after a glass or two.

67. Grandparents are proof that you can be old and wise while still having a great sense of humor.

68. Grandparents are like fine wine; they improve with age, and they might spill a little too.

69. Grandparents are the best storytellers, especially when they’re telling the same story for the hundredth time.

70. Grandparents are living proof that you can be young at heart even when your hair turns gray.

71. I’m not saying you’re old. But if you were wine you would be really expensive.
(Shop card at Amazon)

Funny card for grandparents with "I’m not saying you’re old. But if you were wine you would be really expensive."
Photo courtesy of Amazon

Funny grandparents quotes for grandpa

72. 49% Grandpa, 51% Basass.

73. I  feel bad for other people because I clearly have the best grandpa.

74. Thanks for being my grandpa. If I had a different grandpa, I would punch him in the face and go find you!

75. Grandpa-saurus. Like a normal grandfather, but more awesome.

76. If Grandpa can’t fix it, no one can.

77. I smile because you’re my grandpa. I laugh because there’s nothing you can do about it.

78. We have the perfect grandpa & granddaughter (or son) relationship. You’re my grandpa and I am perfect.

79 Funny Grandpa definition card.
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Card with a funny definition of a grandpa
Photo courtesy of Pineapple Gift Shop

Funny grandparents quotes for grandma

80. Dear grandma, thank you for being my grandma. If another lady was my grandma, I’d punch her in the face and go find you.

81. Grandma, thanks for always giving me those things that mom says I shouldn’t have.

82. I smile because you’re my grandma. I laugh because there’s nothing you can do about it.

83. We have the perfect grandmother & granddaughter (or son) relationship. You’re my grandmother and I am perfect.

84. Grandma, I love you so much it won’t fit on this card.
(Shop card at Amazon)

Funny card with 'Grandma, I love you so much it won’t fit on this card.'
Photo courtesy of Amazon

85. Grandma, I think you’re pretty great! In return, please confirm I am your favorite grandchild by blinking once.

86. Grandma, no matter what life throws at you, at least you don’t have ugly grandchildren.

87. Nana, I love you more than biscuits!

88. Grandma. The woman, the myth, the bad influence.

89. Five-star rating card.
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Funny card with a rating for grandma
Photo courtesy of Shy Bee Print Co

Famous funny grandparents quotes

90. “Grandparents are there to help the child get into mischief they haven’t thought of yet.” — Gene Perret

91. “The simplest toy, one which even the youngest child can operate, is called a grandparent.” — Sam Levenson

92. “If I had known how wonderful it would be to have grandchildren, I’d have had them first.” — Lois Wyse

93. “Being a grandmother is wonderful. One moment you’re just a mother. The next you are all-wise and prehistoric.” — Pam Brown

94. “Something magical happens when parents turn into grandparents. Their attitude changes from “money-doesn’t-grow-on-trees” to spending it like it does.” — Paul Linden

95. “When grandparents enter the door, discipline flies out the window.” Ogden Nash

Funny grandparents quote by Ogden Nash "when grandparents enter the door, discipline flied out the window"
Funny grandparent quote by Ogden Nash

Save these funny grandparents jokes

Did you save these funny grandparents jokes and quotes on Pinterest yet?

95 funny quotes to share with your grandparents

Final notes on funny grandparents quotes

So whether you’re celebrating a special occasion or just showing your appreciation, I hope that these funny grandparents quotes helped you to create heartwarming and hilarious moments. Share the love, spread the laughter, and remember, grandparent bonds are forever.

AUTHOR

Hi, I’m Lara, a 30-year-old travel-lover (but who’s not these days?). I love reading, puzzling, world-heritage sites, researching, and making lists, which comes in quite handy when you’re making lists of travel gift ideas!