104 Funny St. Patrick’s Day Quotes To Make Your Friends Green With Envy!

Written by: Lara
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Funny St Patrick's Day quotes with an image of leprecahuns

Are you ready to turn your St. Patrick’s Day into an uproarious celebration of all things Irish? Well, you’ve struck gold, because today we’ll be sharing no less than 104 funny St. Patrick’s Day quotes to make your friends LOL. Whether you’re looking to add some cheeky charm to your greeting cards, send a humorous message to your family and coworkers, or just want to sprinkle a bit of Irish wit on social media, we’ve got you covered.

From witty one-liners to hilarious puns that’ll have everyone rolling their eyes (in a good way, of course), our collection is as diverse as the many shades of green you’ll see on the streets.

So, grab your shamrock shake, put on your green suit, and let’s dive into a world where humor is as abundant as clovers in an Irish meadow.

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104 funny quotes to share on St Paddy's Day

Funny St Patrick’s Day quotes about being Irish

1. IRISH you a Happy St. Patrick’s Day!

2. I can’t keep calm, I’m IRISH!

3. Kiss me, I’m Irish (and also your wife, so kiss me).
(Shop card at Etsy)

Two sizes of St patrick's Day cards
Funny kiss me card

4. Irish today, hungover tomorrow.

5. If you’re not Irish today, then you’re the driver.

6. Happy St. Patrick’s Day! Let’s celebrate the day when everyone suddenly remembers their distant Irish ancestry.

7. Don’t worry, be Irish! Happy St. Patrick’s Day!

8. On St. Patrick’s Day, everyone is Irish! Except for the Scottish, they’re still Scottish.

9. Funny top five reasons to be Irish card.
(Shop card at Etsy)

A funny card with reasons why it's good to be Irish
Photo courtesy of JPEG Greetings

10. St. Patrick’s Day is like the gym in January. Suddenly everyone is Irish.

11. May your day be as long as an Irish story and your pints as full as an Irish heart.

12. Today, let’s drink like the Irish, dance like the Irish, and when the bill comes, pretend to be Scottish.

13. Wishing you a pot o’ gold and all the joy your Irish heart can hold. Or at least enough beer to forget you’re not actually Irish.

14. May your St. Patrick’s Day be as authentic as an American-Irish pub with Italian pizza on the menu.

15. To being Irish for a day – because 24 hours is about all anyone can handle!
(Shop card at Etsy)

Two sizes of St patrick's Day cards

16. Here’s to a day of pretending to know where Ireland is on a map. Happy St. Patrick’s Day!

17. I’m not really Irish, I just want to get drunk.
(Shop card at Etsy)

Two sizes of St patrick's Day cards

18. Funny Irish blessing card.
(Shop card at Etsy)

A funny St Patrick's Day quote card
Photo courtesy of The Best Card Company

St Patrick’s Day puns

19. Let’s get shamrocked.

20. Ready to shamrock and roll.

21. Irish you were beer.

22. The Paddy don’t start till I walk in.

23. I’m not Irish, but my coffee is!

24. Irish you a happy St. Patrick’s Day!

25. You’re my lucky charm.

26. Don’t worry, beer happy!

27. Irish I had another pint.

28. Feeling green with envy? Must be St. Patrick’s Day.

29. Go green or go home!

30. Irish today, hungover tomorrow.

31. Keep calm and leprechaun.

Keep calm and leprechaun!
St. Patrick’s Day Leprechaun pun

Funny St Patrick’s Day quotes about drinking

32. May your luck be plenty and your beer green.

33. I’m so Irish, my blood type is Guinness.

34. I’m not Irish, but my beer is. Does that count?

35. On St. Patrick’s Day, my Irish comes out. And so does my whiskey.

36. Irish you all the happiness this St. Patrick’s Day – and a pint or two, of course!

37. Happy St. Patrick’s Day! Today, everyone’s Irish. Tomorrow, everyone’s hungover.

38. 0% Irish, but 100% drunk.

39. Today let’s drink like a Gallagher!

40. Let’s all get day drunk for Ireland!

41. Funny card about being Irish.
(Shop card at Etsy)

A funny card for St Patrick's Day
Photo courtesy of The Best Card Company

42. May you always have a clean shirt, a clear conscience, and enough coins in your pocket to buy a pint! Irish blessing

43. Here’s to a long life and a merry one, a quick death and an easy one, a pretty girl and an honest one, a cold beer – and another one!

44. Let’s get LUCK’ed up!

45. St. Patrick’s Day is like Valentine’s Day for people who love beer more than people.

46. Irish I had a beer! Oh wait, I do. Happy St. Patrick’s Day!

47. On St. Patrick’s Day, the only gold I’m chasing is in a glass of golden brew.

48. May your tea be strong, your beer be Irish, and your heart be happy this St. Patrick’s Day.

49. Happy St. Patrick’s Day! May your beer be green and your hangover invisible.

50. May your St. Patrick’s Day be beery, and oh so cheery!

51. St. Patrick’s Day is like Valentine’s Day for people who love beer and bad decisions. Like us.

52. Happy St Patrick’s Day. This is the one holiday where our full-blown alcoholism could possibly go unnoticed. 
(Shop card at Etsy)

Happy St Patrick's Day quote card
Photo courtesy of Quirky Card Company

Funny St Patrick’s Day quotes for friends

53. When you run out of excuses, blame it on the leprechauns.

54. In honor of St Patrick’s Day, you’ll find a little green inside [color a green clover inside the card].

55. Tis the day St Paddy drove all the snakes out of Ireland!

56. It’s not easy being green… unless it’s St. Patrick’s Day.

57. Happy St Patrick’s Day, you lucky bastard!

58. You’re not short. You’re the world’s tallest leprechaun. Happy St. Paddy’s Day shorty!

59. Go home snakes. You’re drunk.
(Shop card at Etsy)

A funny car for St Patrick's Day
Photo courtesy of Lorem Ipsum Cards

60. Pinch and I’ll punch, but have a great St Patrick’s Day!

61. Happy St. Patrick’s Day! Remember: not all leprechauns are imaginary… some are just really tall!

62. St. Patrick’s Day is like the tofu of holidays: it’s what you make of it!

63. Let’s celebrate St. Patrick’s Day by putting green food dye in everything and pretending it’s festive.

64. May your St. Patrick’s Day be as authentic as an Irish pub in the heart of Boston.

65. May you find your pot of gold today (and the I.R.S. not find out about it).

66. Funny how to speak Irish card.
(Shop card at Etsy)

How to speak Irish, funny St Patrick's Day quote card
Photo courtesy of Quirky Card Company

Funny St Patrick’s Day quotes for your loved one

67. You SHAMROCK my world! So excited to see you this month at our favorite parade!

68. You’re my lucky charm.

69. Show me your shamrocks… I mean, Happy St. Patrick’s Day!
(Shop card at Etsy)

Two sizes of St patrick's Day cards

70. You look great in green. But do you know what looks even better on you? Nothing 😉

71. I know who’s getting lucky tonight. You, it’s you.

72. I’m not Irish, but kiss me anyway.

73. It’s me. I’m the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.

74. You don’t need luck, you already have me!

 75. I guess I’m just lucky and you are a lucky f*cker.
(Shop card at Etsy)

Two sizes of St patrick's Day cards

76. Irish you were naked.

77. Kiss me, I’m Irish (ish). Okay, I’m not, but I’m your husband which counts too right?

78. We go together like corned beef and cabbage.
(Shop card at Etsy)

Funny St Patrick's Day pun card
Photo courtesy of Water Street Design

Jokes about St Patrick’s Day

79. How can you spot a jealous shamrock? It will be green with envy!

80. What do you get when two leprechauns have a conversation? A lot of small talk!

81. Why should you never iron a four-leaf clover? You don’t want to press your luck!

82. Why do people wear shamrocks on St. Patrick’s Day? Regular rocks are too heavy!

83. What’s a leprechaun’s favorite cereal? Lucky Charms!

What's a leprechaun's favorite cereal? Lucky Charms!
Funny St Patrick’s Day joke

Funny St Patrick’s Day Insta captions

84. Eat, drink, and wear green.

85. The leprechauns made me do it!

86. I’m feeling lucky.

87. Get your Irish on!

88. Pinches get stitches.

89. Who needs luck? I have charm. #StPatricksDay

90. Feeling a wee bit Irish today. 🍀

91. Keep calm and shamrock on!

92. Today’s to-do list: drink coffee, wear green, be awesome.

93. Kiss me, I’m pretending to be Irish today!

94. Wearing green and feeling keen. #StPatricksDayVibes

95. Blame it on the leprechauns! #StPaddysMischief

96. Is it just me or is everything greener today?

97. Green beer counts as a veggie today, right? 🍺 #StPatricksDayHealth

A St Patrick's Day Instagram post
St. Patrick’s Day Instagram caption

Poems and blessings for St Paddy’s Day

98. St. Patrick’s Day is here, you see. We’ll pick shamrocks, one, two, three. We’ll count the leaves and look them over, And maybe find a four-leafed clover. I’ll sew green buttons on my vest, Green for St. Patrick is the best. I’ll wear a green hat, very high, And dance a jig—at least I’ll try!

99. May your blessings outnumber the shamrocks that grow, and may trouble avoid you wherever you go. Except for today – a little trouble is fun!

100. Happy St. Patrick’s Day! May you have all the happiness and luck that life can hold—and at the end of your rainbows may you find a pot of gold.

101. May your pockets be heavy and your heart be light, and may good luck pursue you each morning and night. And in case it doesn’t just blame the leprechauns.

102. There are only two kinds of people in the world, The Irish and those who wish they were. Irish Saying

103. If you’re lucky enough to be Irish, you’re lucky enough! Irish Proverb

104. May you have the hindsight to know where you’ve been, the foresight to know where you are going, and the insight to know when you have gone too far.

Happy St Patrick's Day with a funny poem
Funny St Patrick’s Day poem

How to sign a St Patrick’s Day card

When you’re sending St. Patrick’s Day quotes and cards, you want to have a cute way to sign off your card too.

If you’re not sure how to end your St Patrick’s Day greetings, here are some suggestions for how you can sign off with a touch of Irish charm or festive spirit.

From standard ones to unique ideas.

  1. “Happy St. Patrick’s Day!”
  2. “Warmest St. Paddy’s Day wishes,”
  3. “Best wishes this St. Patrick’s Day,”
  4. “With all my luck on St. Patrick’s Day,”
  5. “Toasting to you this St. Patrick’s Day,”
  6. “With warm Irish greetings,”
  7. “Sending you a shamrock of good luck,”
  8. “May the luck of the Irish be with you,”
  9. “With the joy of the Irish,”
  10. “St. Patrick’s Day blessings,”
  11. “Green wishes on St. Patrick’s Day,”
  12. “In the spirit of the Irish,”
  13. “Celebrating St. Paddy’s Day with you in spirit,”
  14. “With a touch of Irish luck,”
  15. “St. Patrick’s Day cheers,”
  16. “May your St. Patrick’s Day be filled with joy,”
  17. “Thinking of you this St. Patrick’s Day,”
  18. “With luck and laughter on St. Patrick’s Day.”
  19. “Sláinte!” (Pronounced “slawn-cha,” meaning “health” in Irish)
  20. “May the luck of the Irish be with you!”
  21. “With a jig and a smile,”
  22. “Luck and laughter,”
  23. “Cheers to you!”
  24. “Over the rainbow,”
  25. “Wishing you a pot o’ gold,”
  26. “Stay green,”
  27. “Leprechaun kisses and Irish wishes,”
  28. “In the spirit of St. Paddy,”
  29. “Irish blessings,”
  30. “Dancing a jig for you,”
  31. “From your favorite leprechaun,”
  32. “With a clover in my pocket,”
  33. “Keepin’ it green,”
  34. “Shamrockin’ and rollin’,”
  35. “With a heart full of clovers,”
  36. “Wearing my green heart on my sleeve,”
  37. “Under a rainbow,”
  38. “From my Irish heart to yours.”

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The 105 funniest St Patrick's Day quotes and jokes

Final notes on funny St Patrick’s Day wishes

Alright! These are our favorite funny St. Patrick’s Day quotes to elevate your celebrations and charm your friends. May these quotes bring more laughter to your day and a touch of Irish wit to your conversations.

Happy St. Patrick’s Day, and remember, everyone’s Irish today… but let’s not push our luck tomorrow! Sláinte!

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Hi, I’m Lara, a 30-year-old travel-lover (but who’s not these days?). I love reading, puzzling, world-heritage sites, researching, and making lists, which comes in quite handy when you’re making lists of travel gift ideas!